December 17th, 2011

That night
with a gray sky making silhouettes
I saw two beautiful creatures
with flames on their skin
snow at their tips
that chased after the essence of life
and devoured it.
You and I feared their way.
So we bravely sneak pass.
Leaving a flowing night
when we entered from the shadows at last.
You laid your flesh.
I slowly left
though you bid me return.
Feast on what I yearn.
And for a moment learn
what it means to chase life.
Time disappeared into a hole in my heart.
While happy
I feared we’d part.
The sun soon began dawning.
Your tired eyes yawning
asked for me
to go with the morning.
So away I went
my time was then spent
thinking to myself
of the creatures outside
that chased after life.  

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Pictures With Words

Stare into space.
Lie on your back.
I’ll paint this time.
Close your eyes and listen.
The light glistens on you.
Casting contrasting shadows
while my emotions quietly battle.
Your scarf has me at a lost.
I hoped to see the eggs of man’s desire.
As you kick off shoes
I see blue hills
that I’d journey longer than the Hebrews
if only to reach the promise land.
I stopped asking
merely basking in this moment
hoping that for a second
I can trace the lines
the artist divine
drew to make you.

Lover’s Taboo

I say please. She nods. I feel higher than God.
This isn’t real though I like the facade. And that’s real.
Warm treats cause chills
You complement my body.
Words accompanying my hungry breathing.
After this you tell me you’re leaving.
Our relationship is so deceiving.

I watch her walk away
I like how she struts not sways
With her I want to play.
I wait. With kisses she sedate the thoughts of late.
Sometimes I become afraid when I think
My heart starts to sink.
The taste of pink reassures me though
Her reason for this is physical. Mine emotional
Though I wish feelings mutual.
When I imagine this will stay the fashion
I have feelings that mix.
My mind plays tricks that I can’t fix.
I feel sick knowing I’ll relinquish
this status as she moves on.
Some days she says
I imagine forever here
but I could never call you dear.
She smiles. I feel beguiled. She’s so young
Yet I feel like the child.

As she approaches I reproach such thoughts
Though this seems taboo
Though I know not what to do.
I’m happily depressed with you.

To Expectations

I’m sorry I got in so late last night.
Your car is where it should be.
There’s a scar on the left.
I parked a bit drunkenly.
Are you happy
I returned safely?
Don’t look so angry.
I tend to disappoint people.
That’s a disappointment to me.
I think that’s the reason
for all my drinking.
I want to make you proud.
Throughout my life I’ve tried
doing that same thing now.
I worry too much about this.
You cross your arms.
I defend myself
from insults and attacks.
Please take those words back.
You’re disappointed in me?
Don’t say such a thing.
It’s as though you don’t love me.
I think I lost track in drunken dreams.
That’s my plan for now.
It has been said I’m ruining my life.
Your deduced reasons are wrong.
I’m not drinking to ruin my life.
I drink when you think I am ruining my life.

Thoughts on Friends

It was a strange feeling
We were drunk or high
staring at the ceiling.
I don’t know which
but since I kissed a sky
I’d say it was the latter.
I remember licking your cake batter
off your finger.
Talking about dreams
that linger then never happen.
Childhood words from two kids.
I remember adolescent years
partly still here
with us skipping lectures
and exams over long spans
to sit in seats elsewhere.
Look at other faces.
Talk about sad things.
That happens.
I remember my anger
and your smile those times
as you detailed others
I remember false lovers
and could have and want to be’s.
I remember cold Decembers
knitted scarves
and those from Mars
observing from far away
as if I was an alien as well.
I remember hugs and silk threads
that my fingers cruised through
to comfort you and to be comforted.
I remember my lies and honesty
and all that in between.
I remember salty drops ending
dirty trails on snow
that descended from deep blue pools
reflecting apologies and words of no.
I think I remember
a sad close to a journey
with swift movements
east and west
trying to redress
the ship that was filling
with water from the inside
as the twin ice blue ponds
thawed and realised
what I had been looking for.