The Party Before

The problem with driving
was surviving the return
while in a daze,
constantly amazed at life,
even though
you’re walking a tight rope
millions of miles from Earth.
But we weren’t close
and I found walking difficult. 
Planning while sober
to not get pulled over
living in the moment
existing in laughter at jokes
and sleeping in green pastures
that were all all in your head.
That’s how these nights tend to go
My friends are welcoming enough
in that
they don’t mind my guest
though half the time
with her hiding behind me
I wonder if they know she exists.
I coast from person to person
conversing with the few people there
and yeah…I would like to skip
to the fun part
but I can’t seem desperate.
She drifts
a leash keeping her.
As they are starting
her and I 
sit in a circle.
My friend passes a cigarette.
I take a drag
while she quickly passes.
The can of soda
that she nervously hold
may do the job though.
Her eyes open to show
pupils dilated
and my friends know,
as one laughs,
and she falls on her back
as though pushed.
i glance at her
with a grin
then place the tab on my tongue.